blonde jokes

ok, 'bout time we had some blonde jokes here...
Breaking Out Of Jail


A brunette, a red-head and a blonde were in jail when they decided to break out. The girls broke out and the brunette said,

"Let's hide in that barn, they'll never find us."

So they climed up the ladder and then the blonde threw it down.

The next morning, the cops said, "Come out with your hands in the air!"

The red-head said, "Hide in those baskets, they'll never find us!"

So the Brunette got in the first one, the red-head got in the second one and the blonde got in the third one. Meanwhile, the cops were getting a ladder set up and trying to get up there. Once they got up, the seargent ordered them to kick the baskets.

So the cop kicked the first one: "RUFF."
"It's just a damn dog!" yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next one: "MEOW."
"It's just a damn cat," yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next basket and the blonde yelled, "POTATOES!"

One wish to each
Three blondes were walking through the desert when they found a magic genie's lamp.

After rubbing the lamp to make the genie appear, he said, "I will grant three wishes, one for each of you."

The first said, "I wish I were smarter."

So, she became a redhead.

The second blonde said, "I wish I were smarter than she is."

She became a brunette.

The third blond ordered, "I wish I were smarter than both of them!"

So, she became a man.

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come over here and help



me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get

started.'



Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when it's finished?'


The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster.'





Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.



She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over

the table.



He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns

to

her and says,



'First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to

assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.'



He takes her hand and says, 'Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a



nice cup of tea, and then ...' he said with a deep sigh, . .. . .. . .









(scroll down)








'Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.'

Two casino dealers (youngster and Randy if you will) are at the craps table when a cute blonde comes over and says, "I want to bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. But, if you don't mind, I'd feel much luckier if I were completely nude." They say fine, she strips naked from the neck down, and rolls the dice. Then she screams, "I won! I won!" She starts jumping up and down, hugs each of the dealers, and then picks up her money and her clothes and walks away. For a minute the two dealers stare at each other. Then the first one says, "What did she roll, anyway?" The second dealer says, "I don't know. I thought you were watching."

Moral of this story......not All blondes are dumb!!!

I don't see a problem here

DUMB BLOND GUY JOKE.......

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blond guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I'm going to jump off this building"

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Tacos again! If I get tacos one more time I'm going to jump off, too."

The blond opened his lunch and said, "Bologna again. If I get a bologna sandwich one more time I'm jumping too."

The next day the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage and jumped to his death.

The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a taco and jumped too.

The blond opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage I never would have given it to him again!"

The Mexicans wife also wept and said, "I could have given him chile verde or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated tacos so much."

Everyone turned and stared at the blond's wife.

"Hey, don't look at me," she said, "He makes his own lunch."

thats a good one